Author: Lori Earle
If Chinchillas Could Place Personal Ads
It took two long weeks of living side-by-side in separate cages for our chinchillas Abe and Muffy to finally decide that they’d like to live together. Muffy then moved into Abe’s cage and they started snuggling soon afterwards. They’ve adjusted well to each other and seem to have no regrets about no longer being singletons. There was really only one minor problem, as my husband’s commented on awhile back. “I wonder if Abe would have accepted Muffy if he’d known she’d get the runs so easily?” he mused. Abe was getting a little bit huffy because these digestive upsets were making his raisin treat schedule somewhat erratic. Luckily, Muffy’s stomach problems were easily solved, and life has gone back to normal in their cage. However, it did start me thinking one day (while cage cleaning, of course), what would it be like if chins could place their own personal ads? Here are a few I came up with, trying to keep in mind a chinchilla’s point of view.
Single male gray standard seeks easygoing female cagemate of any color, age 2-5. Freckled ears ok. I enjoy quiet nights in my hammock and the occasional toilet paper tube. Will share raisins, in exchange for grooming my face. If you’d like to share my peaceful cage, please bark twice and put a raisin in my mailbox.
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Sophisticated beige female, 5, seeks male roommate (preferably neutered) for companionship and snuggling. No dependants, please – my kits are all grown. I love lounging all day on my sleeping perch and chewing on my cardboard house at night. Join me for some discreet nibbling. Call after dark. Jazzie
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Rambunctious 3 year old male seeks energetic male cagemate, age not important. Chewing is my game, and I could use some help demolishing all my cardboard houses. When I’m not chewing, I’m devising escape plans to try out at feeding time. At night, I play spin the salt wheel and bench-press my pine chew toys. No girlie chins, please! Leave a message (along with some soy protein mix) for Seamus.
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Handsome male standard grey desperately seeking gorgeous black velvet female to start family. I’m good with kits, and would help out around the cage. Must have an easy going temperament and love to play. No maloccluders, please. Come share my spacious 2 story cage with me, and enjoy access to my vintage cardboard collection. All replies receive complimentary raisins.
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